“Cool Story Bilbo” available at TheYetee.com, 15th November 2012, only $11.
A foolish Hobbit once proffered the question “Hey Bilbo! Long time no see. Where’ve you been dude?”, and while all others around groaned and slumped back into chairs, covering their disapproving faces with tankards of beer, (for they knew what was to come), the suddenly isolated Hobbit became aware of an overwhelming feeling he’d soon regret his enquiry.
“Well…”, began Bilbo…
[Time passes. Gandalf goes East.]
”Yeah? SCREW YOU Gandalf!” screamed Bilbo, obviously peeved at the wizened old man’s impatient exit from the story to end all stories.
He’d been so caught up in his tales of bravery, of fighting strange creatures, befriending others, battling Orcs and other ugly buggers, dragons - and oh yes, and Sméagol - that he hadn’t noticed the complete absence of the reluctant audience.
All that remained were empty tankards and a short note…
“Been there, and back again, off to buy the t-shirt… Cool Story Bilbo!”